We have a toddler who interrupts as well, making it challenging for me to focus on the work/older child. Any ideas for helping grow attention span? There is a lot of creative/independent play that happens during the day, so maybe now is not the time to worry about sustained interest.

Signed,

Unfocused in Underwood

Advice

Dear Unfocused,

You are not alone in this struggle! With families all occupying the same space during the day, there are bound to be countless distractions, diversions and rabbit holes to chase for us all. It takes a lot of persistence and a strong will to stay on task. Unless the activity is perfectly aligned with our child’s will and abilities, it’s likely unable to hold the same weight it would within a classroom of inspired and inspiring peers.

However, it’s important to note that this challenge of distraction is not unique to the home environment. Unlike conventional public school settings, where all children are doing more or less the same thing at the same time, the Montessori classroom is a bustling place full of potential distractions and diversions. There’s a ton of movement, instruments playing, friends having a chat, children moving this way and that all doing something different at the same time. This design is purposeful- we know that children can develop even stronger skills of concentration when given the space and time to practice coming back to an activity that draws them in.

** Notice how I mentioned the activity ‘drawing them in’? Check in with the activity/work- is it interesting to your child? Can you shift the focus so it becomes interesting? Is it fun and empowering? Does it inspire focus? This is crucial! If an activity seems to not directly inspire your child, you can always reach out to your child’s Guide to discuss strategies for making it more relevant/inspiring to your child in this moment. There’s probably a way to turn the lesson into a game, challenge or opportunity for movement!

One ‘unseen’ element that makes concentration in the midst of chaos possible is the grace & courtesy lessons that go along with our bustling environment. Grace and courtesy lessons are introduced formally, by the Guide or Assistant and are modeled time and time again by the elders in the environment and by the teachers. The lesson starts out in a small group gathering with the words, for instance “I’m going to show you what it looks like when someone’s concentrating” and that exact thing is modeled carefully. Then the Guide transfers the action to a willing student, “Stella, you can show us what it looks like when you’re concentrating.’’ We use these lessons to share social graces and courtesies that are often expected of children, out of context so they can practice the skill and gain it without feeling blame or shame. Their absorbent minds soak up the opportunity to learn this way!

Protecting concentration is paramount in the Montessori classroom and deserves a great deal of focus. We center many grace and courtesy lessons around protecting concentration. We model ‘what to do when someone’s concentrating’ (*observe silently, without touching their work, or just simply walk by them quietly*). We also model ‘what to say if someone is disturbing your work’ (*calmly say, ‘I need space.’*) And then follow that up with ‘what to do when someone says, “I need space.” (*walk away!*) The possibilities are endless and our choice of what to show comes directly from observation of the children’s activity in the classroom.

In order to protect concentration in your home:

Set up and prepare an environment where each of your children has a place for their activities and supplies as well as a space for working. These spaces can be separate or near one another. The materials and supplies should be orderly and limited to ensure your children can accomplish set up and clean up before and after an activity.
Establish a routine that works for your family and stick to it! Even toddlers thrive with routine- so long as their routine has their interests and needs in mind. Decide a time of day when focusing and concentration can happen, like 9-10 am and again at 1:00-2:30 pm for non-nappers. Observe your children’s most productive time of day and offer school time during that window.
Discuss what it looks like and what it means to concentrate with all your children. Practice modeling concentration for one another, like we do with the grace and courtesy lessons, and practice what to do when someone asks for space.
Be sure your toddler has plenty of age appropriate activities to center and focus their attention, and be ready with backup activities when concentration strikes for your older children. You can always whisk your toddler away to the garden to look for bugs or to the other room to read a book. Ask your toddler, ‘what would you like to concentrate with right now?’ Help them get engaged and step back when they’re concentrating.
Check in with the activity- is your child interested? How can we make it MORE interesting? Is there any incentive to ‘finish it’? Often, the allure of staples creates the want to make a written booklet or complete a full series.
A preschool/kinder child builds concentration by working with something in their hands- sewing, drawing, beading, and clay are all wonderful activities for building concentration and task-persistence.
Model being unavailable sometimes too, for a short time, while you focus on a book or finishing a conversation. Let concentration be a part of your day, too, and let that be felt by all!
Help your children by being sure not to distract them yourself. Learn to spot and protect concentration, and share it with the other adults in your life. So often, we want to jump in and fill the child’s experience with our own interpretation and influence. It’s well intentioned, but we must learn to let our children have their own revelations and discoveries!

Dr. Montessori shared this food for thought:

“Praise, help, or even a look, may be enough to interrupt him, or destroy the activity. It seems a strange thing to say, but this can happen even if the child merely becomes aware of being watched. After all, we too sometimes feel unable to go on working if someone comes to see what we are doing. The great principle which brings success to the teacher is this: as soon as concentration has begun, act as if the child does not exist. Naturally, one can see what he is doing with a quick glance, but without his being aware of it.”

Montessori’s revelations about the nature of childhood came through observing their desire for concentration and self-formation. She noticed that from a very early age, children thrive when they are set up to explore with work matched to their interests and ability, that concentration, flow and great satisfaction follow. Dr. Montessori said, “The first essential for the child’s development is concentration. The child who concentrates is immensely happy.”

Best of luck to you in this continued time of ‘distance learning’ and quarantine. Please don’t hesitate to reach out to your child’s Guide to discuss ideas, activities and supports for home!

Sincerely,

Maria

To submit questions, please email admin@littleoakmontessori subject line “Dear Maria.”

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